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  • Writer's pictureEllen Bookman

It's time to pick up the pen again...

It literally causes me anxiety when I don't write for a while and usually means one of three things: (a) extremely busy (b) overwhelmed to the point of immobility and (c) I'm not feeling well. This time, it's been all three -- the perfect storm. The silence is deafening.

Too many life changes happening all at once -- major life changes.

Reconcilling my parent's mortality.

Coming face to face with my parent's mortality is almost impossible to conceive. I recently felt completely helpless as my sister’s calls and text messages flooded my phone. Both my dad and my mom we’re having issues - my dad’s heart and my mom’s stage four Alzheimersl

I panic every time the phone rings.

Even in the worst of times, there are lessons to be learned.

I decided I had to drive down to Miami at the very moment I heard about my mom's decline my father's heart situation. What was I waiting for? Covid to end? Feeling 100 percent well?

Lee and I jumped in the car.

The Palace visit.

My first stop was to see my dad, who rightfully so, lives in the Palace in Coral Gables, FL. He had just suffered his second heart attack in about six weeks but was well after his two hospital stays resulting in two stents. We had two wonderful visits -- both Lee and I in our PPE .

The visits were spent with me interviewing my dad about his early life, life with my mom and his three daughters. A hero in his own right, my dad is larger than life, smart, funny and full of fascinating stories about his travels, March of the Living and various other topics.

The Visit.

I entered the house my mom lives in with four other Alzheimer patients feeling a little nauseous. I first saw her staring into space through the glass sliding door and immediately started crying. I couldn't stop. We sat there for a while hoping to see a glimmer that she recognized me.

At some point, she reached out for my hand. While I crouched in front of her wheelchair still crying, I realized that she was actually reacting to my presence. We sat there for a while and a peace like I have never felt before overtook me. I felt better and did what every person would have done in my shoes - I actually broke out into a tap dance. I know that somewhere inside, my mom was laughing.

I love lessons and this was a biggie.

Don't wait.

Say what needs to be said.

Reconcile differences.

Love and Live Hard!!!

Never Give Up.



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