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  • Writer's pictureEllen Bookman

I will laugh tomorrow.

Story of the day. My mom has Alzheimer's. I can't even say the words sometimes. I am not there for the day to day. I don't have the responsibility of making decisions-- I salute my sister as she navigates this horrendous situation with my dad.

So, I am going to Miami on Saturday, and I am beyond scared. That's my mom. She took care of me! She was the first one I called with good and bad news. What I am about to say is crazy. I did not tell my mom about "the Park" diagnosis. Why does this haunt me? It would have been a terrible thing to do to her.

She may not have even understood. But, I still feel like calling her everyday to whine and moan, as I have always done. She can't take care of me anymore. I can't take care of her. I am sad 😢.

I love you mom. I know that somewhere inside of you is still you! I miss you!

Lesson learned today;

I got a hot flash immediately following a not-so-great text from my sister about mom's status.

The lesson is to not be shocked anymore as my mom's situation continues to decline because hot flashes suck!

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